अनाश्रित: कर्मफलं कार्यं कर्म करोति य: |
स संन्यासी च योगी च न निरग्निर्न चाक्रिय: || 1||
One who is unattached to the fruits of his work and who works as he is obligated is in the renounced order of life, and he is the true mystic, not he who lights no fire and performs no duty.
In his latest book “Think Again”, Adam Grant invites readers to let go of knowledge and opinions that are no longer serving well, and to anchor one’s sense of self in flexibility, rather than consistency.
This led me to think about why it is difficult for us to change our minds in the first place. What makes us so attached to our beliefs.
Identity
We tend to attach our beliefs to our identity. Everything we do is then framed around that. Our work, family, parenting, relationships tend to be consistent around that identity. Most decisions we make are shaped by our identity, and in turn also shapes are identity. We tend to become what we believe.
From that place, changing one’s belief becomes a very costly process. You’d have to undo a lot of your primary habits and processes and teach yourself new ones. This can be very difficult and if you’re not supremely motivated, there’s good chance that you’d resist to that change.
Grant suggests that we let go of the equating to our identity and start treating our beliefs as hypotheses. This would result in a life where you’re more flexible and open-minded. More willing to receive opposing opinions, and see every rebuttal as an opportunity to learn, to find the truth.
Love
Iris Murdoch shares a story about faith in her book “Metaphysics as a Guide to Morals”
A mother asks her son, a merchant setting off for the city, to bring her back a religious relic. He forgets her request until he is nearly home again. He picks up a dog’s tooth by the roadside and tells the old lady it is a relic of a saint. She places it in her chapel where it is venerated. It begins miraculously to glow with light.
Mark Hopwood has an interesting analysis in his piece here.
Murdoch through the story tries to make a case for faith, where you trust without doubts. The lack of any doubt made a regular object special. Through faith, a regular dog’s tooth turned into a religious object.
There’s more to it though. This faith also comes from the fact that it was brought by her son. The son who she loves so much, has complete faith on him. She does not doubt, even for a moment, that the object would be anything other than a religious relic. Her faith in that object was born out of her love for her son.
In this case, the belief is rooted deeply in our relationships and the attachment we have with our loved ones. This belief may not always be logical, and changing this belief has implications larger than oneself. How then do you go about updating a belief that has formed through love?
In this case, the detachment is not just from an abstract concept, but from a real entity. An entity that we are really closely attached to. This is where the theory of changing beliefs becomes a little weak in my opinion.
A change of that nature cannot come at an individual level. It has to happen through love again. By conversations that are rooted in trust and respect.
A true mystic is not one who renounces life and lives in isolation. It is one who performs one’s duties, maintains a family life but without attaching to the results of one’s work.